It’s 2:45 in the morning. I’m waiting around to take C to the airport for her VERY early flight. It was originally scheduled for 10, but they bumped it up in order to try and avoid landing in Tropical Storm Fay. Hahahaha.
I always get nervous when C leaves town, I can’t help it. What if something happens? Have I said everything I ever wanted to say to her? Does she know I love her? What if, what if. I’m not a paranoid person, generally, but it’s easy to NOT be paranoid when I can keep an eye on the people I might worry about. Having that person fly into a tropical storm, gosh, that just makes it more exciting!!
Ugh. I know full well that I’ll be sad all day today. It’s just too quiet when she’s out of town, and this will be for 5 days. Thankfully, G and K have invited me over for a late breakfast and I think I might see a movie with M either this afternoon or tonight.
That doesn’t make coming home to an empty apartment any easier.
I joke around with C, asking her to help me come up with some ideas of trouble to get into. But really, I get mopey when she’s gone. I turn on the TV to keep some noise going, and play with the cats. But I realize after a couple of days that unless I make a point to call someone on the phone, I can go without speaking for quite a while. That in itself is just sad, right? It make me have conversations with the cats that are more inane and in-depth than usual. I mean usually it’s just like:
Me: Me-oh Maya!
Maya: Meow meow!
Me: I know! Where’s your string?
Maya: Meow meow!
Me: That’s so clever of you, you’re a sweet kitty.
But when I’m alone for too long and getting desperate it turns into something else entirely.
Me: Maya, I feel as though we’re not connecting like we used to. You were napping on my leg and seemed perfectly content until that moth flew by and now it’s like you’ve forgotten our time together.
Maya: (hunting what is apparently the demon moth that will steal her food and toys and maybe upend her litter box if she doesn’t kill it soon) MEOW!!!!
Me: I know, I hear what you’re saying. But what I’m trying to express is that I think you’re fickle sometimes. And I’m saying this with love. And that hurts my feelings, you know?
I’ve learned that when I try too hard to relate to the cat, she either eats my hair or manages to claw me. I should probably stop that.
Okay, it’s time to take my girlfriend to her plane that will be flying into a maelstrom of death. Yippee.